Not A Typical Family
by Nif
Summary: The senshi are like family. So what would happen if one of them commited suicide? Rei's thoughts on Mina's death. *Sequel to Not A Typical Blond but you don't have to have read it* Warning: Slight f/f hints.


Not A Typical Family  
  
By: Jay aka Nif aka Ex2  
Contact: E_x_2@hotmail.com or J_Nif@hotmail.com  
Warning: Hints of yuri (F/F slash)   
Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon. Didn't make any money. Yatta yatta. Got it? Good.  
Author's Note: Flames, criticism, reviews all welcome! Anyway this is technically a sequel to "Not A Typical Blond" but I guess you don't HAVE to read it to understand this fic. You should go read and review it though ^_~!   
  
  
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I think I'm still in shock. It's been like a week and it still hasn't sunk in. I haven't left the temple since the funeral. I feel like I can't breathe yet I know I am or else I'd be dead by now. I just can't believe it. I find myself asking why. Why would she do this? How could she do this to us? To me?! She's gone and she's not coming back. Just thinking about how I've let her down brings more tears to my eyes. I don't know how long I've been crying but I can tell I won't be stopping any time soon. I've been crying so long I think I'm beginning to forget what it was like when I didn't blubber like a baby. I miss you terribley already Minako...  
  
She always seemed so happy. So full of life and energy. She was the definition of alacrity itself. She was my sun and my reason for living even if she didn't know it. I wish I told you Minako how much you REALLY meant to me. I loved you more than you ever knew. I still do and I think I always will. I should have told you... Maybe then you wouldn't have... you wouldn't have taken your own life. I thought we were close you know? Close enough that if she had a problem then she could talk to me about it. Close enough to call family. I consider all the senshi my family. So why? Damnit Minako, how could you do this to us? I thought you cared...  
  
The whole gang is hurting. I can't even bare talking to them any more because when I see them, I think of you. After all we were family right? And once one family member is gone then the whole family falls apart. The last time I saw them, Usagi was a mess. Sobbing and not understanding just like a child. Ami seemed so deeply saddened to the point all she could do was stare off into space. She doesn't even read for God's sake! Makoto... man I can't even describe Mako-chan. She's...she's just empty. She hasn't cried or at least I haven't seen her yet. I know for a fact that it isn't because she isn't upset. It just seems as if she's so grief-stricken that she just broke. I'm worried about her Mina-chan... At your funeral when she gave the eulogy her eyes looked so dead and barren like the life had been sucked out of them. Her green eyes lost their sparkle and shine. It makes me wonder, was I the only one who loved you in that way? If not, does Mako love you more? Just thinking about that makes me feel so guilty. Again I ask how could you do this to us?   
  
There I go again, being selfish as hell. I should feel bad for not knowing she was in so much pain not bitching about how SHE could hurt US! I wish I could go back in time and ask her if it was anything I did. If it was anything I could have helped with. Why didn't you tell us Aino? What could have been bugging you? Did we even know you at all? Dear Mina, your death is making me want to follow you. Do you think I should? Would it make you happy? Argh shut up Rei! Damn, I'm sorry Mina. I know I'm just being retarded.   
  
Minako you had so much going for you. Okay so you weren't the most brilliant person in Japan (AN: hehe I live in Canada... *cough* anyways) but who is? You had so much more to you than that. You were gorgeous and talented. Kind and caring. You had so much potential and charisma! I admired... I ADMIRE you still so much. You were always so optimistic and cheered us up when we were down. You were a magnificent human being and I was proud to be your friend. I can still look back and say, "Yeah, I knew Aino Minako. She was a wonderful person who will always remain in my heart."   
  
You were such a good person. Why would God take you away from us? I know we didn't deserve you but it's just plain cruel to let humans get know an angel and then have that precious creature taken away so abruptly. It makes me so furious thinking about how a life such as yours has been wasted. I can't say it enough, you were such an amazing person. Damn everything... if a person like you had to take their own life then what kind of world are we living in? See Minako? I'm already turning into a bitter baka without you... I feel so lost and alone. Is that how you felt? Kami I'm so so sorry Mina...   
  
I'm scared now. I think I'm going crazy. I'm talking to a dead person in my mind and they aren't responding and that makes me sad. I'm talking to you Mina so why aren't you answering me? I'm so insane it's not even funny. I feel like sleeping forever. Just not waking up. Not having to deal with all this shit. I'm such a bad person. I should be helping the others heal. What am I doing instead? Brooding and talking to myself like a freak. Whatever... I'm too weak to help them. I'm the one who needs help myself! I try to be strong and act indifferent but I'm just a pathetic, feeble, wimp inside.   
  
All I can think about now is how much I am going miss you. A part of me died with you that night. I hope you know that. And I hope someday we will meet again. Perhaps in heaven? All I want to do is hold you in my arms and tell you how much I love you. Did you love me? Probably not but that's okay. Did you love anyone? I hope you did because if you died without knowing love then that's just depressing. No one deserves that. I just wanted you to be happy but I guess we don't always get what we wish for, eh Mina-chan? Rest in peace my friend, my love. I hope your happy where ever you are.  
  
Love always, Hino Rei.  
  
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A/N 1: Ex2 is a stupid name. I'm retarded. I come up with dumbass names and then after like a couple months or so I'll realized it and it'll be too late. I'm chaning my pen name to Nif soon though. Nif may sound dumb to some people but it's kind of a nick name I have. And Nif sounds better than Niffer... ^_^;;;. Guess what it's short for?  
  
A/N 2: Take a big fat guess why I actually wrote a sequel to Typical Blond? 'Cause I'm fucking grounded! Ugh and I'll probably be grounded for like ever (prob around a month or longer? Jesus...) I deserve it though. I'm such a little shit head. Oh and thanks for anyone who reviewed Typical Blond. I didn't think I'd get any. Prob won't get any for this fic tho. Ya I'm rambling about useless crap but I'm bored so sue me :P! Anyway peace out. 


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